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View Full Version : Two of my pet hates are being called mate by shop assistants and....



Bushtrekker
20-08-2012, 19:57
...shop assitants who haven't got a clue what they are selling. Before we went to Wales I picked up two bottles of wine in Lidl, a Burgundy and a Cotes du Rhone, which turned out to be quite good, so I went in yesterday to see if I could get some more, but couldn't see any, so I asked the assistant who was stocking the shelves when they would be getting more Cotes du Rhone in.

"Is that a wine mate?" was the reply I got and was sorely tempted to either strangle the idiot or tell him it was a cleaning fluid for drains.:D

donkey too
20-08-2012, 20:00
Can't get the staff now days. Also if you pay peanuts you get monkeys.

Deleted user 21925
20-08-2012, 20:37
The late great Dave Allen got it right when he said the following;

"Isn't it strange that when you are arguing with somebody you don't like, you use phrases like "Now look here mate" or "hang on a minute pal", Yet when you see a good friend you say something like "'ow yer goin you old Bugger"".

runnach
20-08-2012, 21:04
Don't let em get you down.........MATE :dance:

dave docwra
20-08-2012, 21:47
Maybe he was just asking you, if that is a flavoured condom...

Dave.

Lorry Ball
20-08-2012, 21:50
...shop assitants who haven't got a clue what they are selling. Before we went to Wales I picked up two bottles of wine in Lidl, a Burgundy and a Cotes du Rhone, which turned out to be quite good, so I went in yesterday to see if I could get some more, but couldn't see any, so I asked the assistant who was stocking the shelves when they would be getting more Cotes du Rhone in.

"Is that a wine mate?" was the reply I got and was sorely tempted to either strangle the idiot or tell him it was a cleaning fluid for drains.:D

The assistant was treating you as an equal, You may think that he's job is way below you, did he tip his hat to you....:bow:
The bloke was a shelf filler/checkout person, not a wine expert and was being friendly he could have said "go forth and multiply",but was in my opinion quite polite, when not at the checkout they are filling shelves, if the Lidl had been in France he might well have known his wines, but most low paid British men don't drink wine, If you are not happy with the staff, Lidl have a Facebook page if you want to complain.
I myself hate wine. so would not have a clue either, and I had to fill wine shelves at Tesco's, most of it nats piss, one of the most boring soul destroying jobs on the planet

Lorry :drive: :cheers:

caspar
20-08-2012, 22:05
I have to say I'm with the OP here. I also despise salespeople on the phone who call you by your Christian name rather than Mr Smith or whatever. To me it's not a question of thinking people are below me, I have equal respect for a toilet cleaner as I do for a Chief Executive and I mix regularly with both and all in between. It's more a question of what one considers good manners or good customer service - words like 'mate' and 'pal' should not be part of that in my opinion.

Bushtrekker
20-08-2012, 22:16
The assistant was treating you as an equal, You may think that he's job is way below you, did he tip his hat to you....:bow:

Lorry :drive: :cheers:


He wasn't treating me as an equal, he was giving in to the irritating habit of a generation raised on 'Neighbours' and 'Home and Away' of calling everyone 'Mate'

I don't think anyone's job is below me, as any of the staff where I worked before I retired would confirm. If I had a day off, what I was doing didn't get done until the following day, whereas if a cleaner or receptionist was off ill it caused major problems, so to me they were of far more importance to the running of the place than I was as a manager.

If you think I was being a wine snob I wasn't, as I don't drink wine and was buying it for my wife. I was just p***ed off at the general apathy and lack of product knowledge.

MORGANTHEMOON
20-08-2012, 22:26
...shop assitants who haven't got a clue what they are selling. Before we went to Wales I picked up two bottles of wine in Lidl, a Burgundy and a Cotes du Rhone, which turned out to be quite good, so I went in yesterday to see if I could get some more, but couldn't see any, so I asked the assistant who was stocking the shelves when they would be getting more Cotes du Rhone in.

"Is that a wine mate?" was the reply I got and was sorely tempted to either strangle the idiot or tell him it was a cleaning fluid for drains.:D

Now if you had waited until you got to Wales to purchase the wine which would have put some money back into our economy to pay back for the cheap night you had in in Bettws y coed and all the free nights we gave you.
The shop assistant here would have said Hiya butt would that be a type of wine?

lol

QFour
20-08-2012, 22:30
Its when the person you have never met rings and says do you mind me calling you Ian. My normal reply is no Mr Johnson will do nicely :ninja::ninja::ninja:

I also hate the guy in the Co-Op that repeatedly called me mate. I pointed out I was not his mate, never was and never will be. Upon complaining to the store manager I received an apology from the store manager and the district manager, who is also a grumpy old git just like me and hates it when people say the same to him.

n brown
20-08-2012, 22:31
i'm from london we call everybody mate,its a friendly thing.i live in bristol they call everybody buddy,its a friendly thing .trouble is what's the alternative,'sir' ?that won't work these days,whenever i hear sir i think 'insincere',i hear mate i'm fine with that. i'm surprised you're surprised that some young minimum wage earner who's possibly never drunk the stuff didn't know what you mean

Firefox
21-08-2012, 01:04
You can get called all kinds of things in shops. Sir, mate, love, chuck, darling depending on who and where... I don't think it's in any way offensive or deliberate, just an automatic thing.

I'd be wary of asking if they have any more of anything in Lidl's though. They seem to shift what they have pretty quick and it's pot luck what comes out next. I doubt if many of the staff know what they are going to shove out the next shift!!

Tony Lee
21-08-2012, 01:37
Another ho-hum complaint generating much ado over nothing.


"Cotes du Rhone" spoken in isolation doesn't automatically point to your request being for a particular wine. Could be cheese or pate or anything foreign. Add a mangling by a non-French speaker and it could have been about anything.

Even if he had passed his O-level French and knew it meant something like "Hills of the Rhône", it would still need to have some supporting information to make it clear what you were looking for. Check out some of the Oz wines with names like "Spring Gully" and you can see why context is necessary

Perhaps next time you could thank your lucky stars that you could find someone to ask and say something like "Good morning my man, I'm looking for some cheap french plonk by the name of Cotes du rhone [spoken phonetically of course]. Had some here yesterday and I bought a case but I drnk it all last night and I'd like to buy some more"

Then the reply would have been "sure mate, its just down the end" or "sorry mate, it all went yesterday" - and then I'll bet you wouldn't have seen any pressing need to make this post

Bushtrekker
21-08-2012, 06:40
I spent most of my working life in contact with the public in one way one another, first in sales and then in public service. When I first started work things were a lot more formal and bosses were always addressed as Mr. followed by their surname, although I did work for one company run by two brothers who insisted on being called Mr. Wilf and Mr. Walter. As it happens I much prefer being called John to Mr. Stokes, but not by someone who has rung to sell me something, or by shop assistants etc. who have never met me before. At the place I've just retired from visitors were always addressed as sir or madam until they became regulars and we knew their names, but even then there was one visitor who, despite having come in for about twenty years, we still addressed as Mr.

The issue of not knowing what Cotes du Rhone is annoyed me because in every other supermarket I've been in the staff know what they are selling, or if they don't will take you to a member of staff who works on that section who does know. This is good staff training and good business sense, as satisfied customers are more likely to return.

pamick
21-08-2012, 07:08
I spent all my working life involved in contact with the public and there is a border at which 'friendliness' becomes impolite. When I couldn't use surnames, men were obviously 'Sir'. However it always sounded too old fashioned to use 'Madam' or 'Ma'am' for women.

Somelier
21-08-2012, 08:13
I HATE being called 'Sir' by anybody and will never address anyone as 'Sir'. When I worked in Grantham for a short spell, I was amused to be called 'ducks' by all the shop staff.

I rarely ask for anything I can't see on a supermarket shelf, because I know that the employee will find it much easier to say that it's 'out of stock' than to actually look to see if they have any. This is also true of places like Halfords, where I've not found what I was looking for, told they don't have it, then spotted it on the shelf.

herbenny
21-08-2012, 08:24
My son is a barber and a very good one at that.....he was sought after to join a very exclusive barbers and on his first day there he was pulled aside and was told he could not refer to anyone as 'mate', its part of his character he is charming and has the gift of the gab and says that its a way of making people feel at ease especially whe you are working in close contact with them. He soon realised that he should follow the guidlines of the shop and if that was what they wanted he had to abide by thier ways. However he feels that he is not being his true self and has to put on a performance everyday.....

I totally understand the frustration of walking into a shop and them not knowing whether they have a particular product....I went into sainsburys to ask for some GI bread ...the young girls didnt have a clue what I was talking about told me if it wasnt on the shelf over there then they didnt have it and resumed thier gossipy conversation aaaaarrrggghhhh !!!!! soooooo not helpful !!!.........

chass
21-08-2012, 08:32
You can call me anything but "early in the morning"

jamesmarshall
21-08-2012, 08:41
I hate when someone is serving you in a shop but carrying on a conversation with a colleague at the same time. It's almost as if you are invisible. whenever it happens now I always ask them to check my change. The amount is invariably correct but I gain the satisfaction of stopping their conversation and gaining some attention. Another pet hate I have is when in a bar and the person serving holds out his/her hand with my change but looks away before I've taken it. I hold out my hand a few inches away from theirs and wait for them to turn around to see why I haven't taken the change, A variation on this is to be looking away as well. Don't get mad, get even.

Daiboy
21-08-2012, 08:47
I hate when someone is serving you in a shop but carrying on a conversation with a colleague at the same time. It's almost as if you are invisible. whenever it happens now I always ask them to check my change..

I usually ask them "Should I come back when you have more time" with a lovely smile (well as lovely as you can get from this old fizzog). It does tend to halt their conversation long enough to get me served.

Daiboy

n brown
21-08-2012, 09:00
when somebody says'have a nice day' i reply according to my mood. 'oh are you american?' more likely though'that's my business,what do you care?'.am i supposed to thank these purveyors of false bonhomie?perhaps i should try 'oh thank you,thats such a kind thought,nobody's been that nice to me for years!can we be best friends?wouldn't that be lovely!' i could completely unnerve them in seconds. someone calls me mate or ducks is friendly.wishing a total stranger a 'nice'day is totally un-british,false, and a bit weird. i think i might try'bugger off i don't like nice days' hmmmm

John H
21-08-2012, 09:08
i'm from london we call everybody mate,its a friendly thing.i live in bristol they call everybody buddy,its a friendly thing .trouble is what's the alternative,'sir' ?that won't work these days,whenever i hear sir i think 'insincere',i hear mate i'm fine with that. i'm surprised you're surprised that some young minimum wage earner who's possibly never drunk the stuff didn't know what you mean

I was getting worried until I read this post. I too originate from London and have a habit of calling people "mate". When I first moved to Derbyshire they all thought it just as amusing as I did their use of the word "duck" - but we soon got used to each other!. I then worked with a burly ex-miner from Yorkshire who automatically called everybody of either sex "flower". Personally I think it is all part of the rich regional pattern that keeps our language vibrant and ought to be encouraged to counter the bland universal culture being fostered by bad American television.

n brown
21-08-2012, 10:13
that's right mate. you allright mate? i'm allright mate. ta mate

bopper
21-08-2012, 10:30
I use Lidl and Aldi stores because like most people they give you bloody cheap shopping and most of the items are of good quality, some even better than well known 'brands'.
Now I also, being East Midlands born and bred call people, "me duck" and when I go to other regions I get called "Mate" "Cocker" or any other regional variation which I accept as being friendly and colloquial.
My point is this.... If I would like to go to a shop where I am called sir, the staff know a bottle of Château Mouton's Rothschild a 1963 vintage port etc; and ask me "what would sir like next"? I would go to a shop where the staff are paid £15 plus per hour and a bottle of cotes-Du-Rhone will cost £20 a bottle instead of £2 .99p from where the staff are paid £6 per hour call me mate and have to sell dog meat as well.

antiquesam
21-08-2012, 13:44
I think this site should be called "Grumpy Old Men/Women". Who cares what your called as long as it's friendly and you get what you want?.:)

marydot
21-08-2012, 15:01
I find it a bit odd when a young person approaches halfway through our pub lunch and says 'Are you GUYS allright?' I'm not a guy, or at least I wasn't lats time I looked!

Around this area, you are likely to be called, 'pet' or 'marrer', 'bonny lad' or 'hinny'. When folks are annoyed, they same names are used, but the intonation changes dramatically. Just think of Jimmy Nail in'Auf Weidersehn, Pet!'

marydot

antiquesam
21-08-2012, 15:08
We stopped in Boston last week and went into a tea room for lunch. The bloke greeted us with "Hi Kids", at 61 I was quite flattered. I'm waiting for someone to ask for proof of age in a pub next.

Firefox
21-08-2012, 15:53
I find it a bit odd when a young person approaches halfway through our pub lunch and says 'Are you GUYS alright?' I'm not a guy, or at least I wasn't lats time I looked!

I think the "guy" thing is American.

The word has 2 meanings.

1. A male

2. In the plural only, people in general, including both males and females

So it's perfectly OK and correct in the USA usage to say "You guys" to a group which includes males and females. Just one of the US influences on UK language I'm afraid... blame too much US TV :D

Bigpeetee
21-08-2012, 15:59
Listen PAL!!!!, I hate you calling me MATE!!!!

Really I don't mind most familiar terms!!

rhubarb
21-08-2012, 19:21
Blimey chill out, life's too short!

If you want to buy wine and need to know the ins and outs of a ducks arse about it, then buy it from an off licence:p

lotty
21-08-2012, 21:17
In Stoke everyone calls you Duck or Shug!
I'm Stoke born and bread but still can not bring myself to call anyone Shug or duck or love etc. to me these pet names are too personnel, I don't even call my hubby duck!
On the other hand I have a member of staff who will use every pet name possible while serving a customer. It's "yes please Shug" salt and vinegar on Hun anything else sweetheart! She has a great rapour with the customers so they mustn't mind?
I don't mind if someone calls me duck or Shug the only thing I don't like is a teenage lad calling me Shug or love! A lad came in the other day and when I asked him a question he answered me with yes please Shug! Shug! He's young enough to be my son! At least he said please I suppose?:D

Mul
21-08-2012, 21:28
Blimey mate youshould write one of those dear editor letters to the Caravan Club, which is primarily why we unsubscribed.

We've a bloke at work who calls EVERYONE "bonnie lad", makes us laugh.

Guess it depends what mood i'm in whether i like it or not.

p.s.

Off to France for two weeks of "Aires" tomorrow :-)

mariesnowgoose
21-08-2012, 21:42
Why, man! Diven't fash yerself si much, pet lambs. Nowt wrang wi' a friendly torn of phrase', ye big daft gowks!

Firefox
21-08-2012, 21:56
I have found some people tend to use the word "mate" or "pal" when slightly angry as though as to try to soften what they are saying.

Eg "Listen, mate, you are out of order saying that" "Or look, pal, you can't can't park there"

n brown
21-08-2012, 22:01
Why, man! Diven't fash yerself si much, pet lambs. Nowt wrang wi' a friendly torn of phrase', ye big daft gowks!

sorry mate?was that a language under the meaning of the act?

maingate
21-08-2012, 22:14
sorry mate?was that a language under the meaning of the act?

Why aye man! :mad2:


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