PDA

View Full Version : Gods own County



Tezza33
20-04-2014, 11:53
My mate said to me, "I met a bloke today from Yorkshire."
"How do you know he was from Yorkshire," I said. "Did he tell you?"
"er, well no."
"Then he wasn't from Yorkshire."

Yorkshire demolition experts. Always looking for t'rubble.

Suicide bombers have today attacked Bradford city centre. Early estimates suggest they may have caused thousands of pounds worth of improvements.

A blunt and straight talking Barnsley lad wakes up one morning with a sore anus, so he goes to the local village shop and says to the assistant, "Na then lad, has tha got any arse cream?"
"Certainly," replies the assistant. "Do you want Magnum or Cornetto?"

Clubbers in Yorkshire have taken to using dental syringes to inject liquid Ecstasy directly into their mouths.
This dangerous process is known as 'E by gum'


I don't know why everyone is suddenly talking about Twerking. My mate from Yorkshire has been doing it for years.
As he says, it's how he gets t'money t'pay t'bills

A Yorkshire suit maker was jailed for five years yesterday.
He got caught selling t'weed.

I've just bought some of that L'Oreal Yorkshire shampoo.
It's made with Eyup Vera.
Cos tha's worth it.

My favourite phrase from Yorkshire would have to be 'Tin tin tin',
Which of course is literally translated as; 'It isn't in the tin'.

I'm pleased Hull has won the City of Culture award for 2017. I once spent a year there; I think it was a Sunday.

antiqueman
20-04-2014, 15:25
some of thats a bit t lancs

MykCamper
20-04-2014, 18:18
some of thats a bit t lancs

:raofl: Chorley not! :banana:

Pauljenny
20-04-2014, 18:45
Derbyshire Eh ?

Any one living south of Wakefield ......


Is..........................

A Cockney !!

Nobody's perfect 'appen !

Tezza33
21-04-2014, 09:52
Derbyshire Eh ?

Any one living south of Wakefield ......


Is..........................

A Cockney !!

Nobody's perfect 'appen !
Born and raised in Barnsley, only left because of work but I am still a Yorkshireman, I married a Cockney though

jamesmarshall
21-04-2014, 12:12
My mate said to me, "I met a bloke today from Yorkshire."
"How do you know he was from Yorkshire," I said. "Did he tell you?"
"er, well no."
"Then he wasn't from Yorkshire."

Yorkshire demolition experts. Always looking for t'rubble.

Suicide bombers have today attacked Bradford city centre. Early estimates suggest they may have caused thousands of pounds worth of improvements.

A blunt and straight talking Barnsley lad wakes up one morning with a sore anus, so he goes to the local village shop and says to the assistant, "Na then lad, has tha got any arse cream?"
"Certainly," replies the assistant. "Do you want Magnum or Cornetto?"

Clubbers in Yorkshire have taken to using dental syringes to inject liquid Ecstasy directly into their mouths.
This dangerous process is known as 'E by gum'


I don't know why everyone is suddenly talking about Twerking. My mate from Yorkshire has been doing it for years.
As he says, it's how he gets t'money t'pay t'bills

A Yorkshire suit maker was jailed for five years yesterday.
He got caught selling t'weed.

I've just bought some of that L'Oreal Yorkshire shampoo.
It's made with Eyup Vera.
Cos tha's worth it.

My favourite phrase from Yorkshire would have to be 'Tin tin tin',
Which of course is literally translated as; 'It isn't in the tin'.

I'm pleased Hull has won the City of Culture award for 2017. I once spent a year there; I think it was a Sunday.

"Tin tin tin"
"Tis int in
"Tint"
"Tis"
"Tint"
"tis atellthee"
"tint sithee

"Ne'er do out for nowt and if tha does owt for nowt, do it fer thisin"

Tezza33
21-04-2014, 15:44
"Tin tin tin"
"Tis int in
"Tint"
"Tis"
"Tint"
"tis atellthee"
"tint sithee

"Ne'er do out for nowt and if tha does owt for nowt, do it fer thisin"I still say 'is it eckerslike' instead of swearing if I am in company

Alf
21-04-2014, 16:51
In which part uh a tarn were tha born then

Alf


Born and raised in Barnsley, only left because of work but I am still a Yorkshireman, I married a Cockney though

Tezza33
21-04-2014, 22:25
Dodworth, my Dad worked at the local pit, Mum worked evenings in the tin factory in Barnsley, we moved to Gilroyd when I was sixteen and all my siblings still live around there (Royston/Worsborough Common/Wath on Dearne/Gilroyd, I was the black sheep because I met somebody from Peckham in Great Yarmouth and married her so eventually left the area in 1975, very strange because we moved to Tamworth and nobody admitted we had moved to the Midlands, when we emigrated to South Africa we became celebrities around the village, I still love Yorkshire though and like every Englishman I am proud of the area I came from, we live 30mins from the Derby Dales so between there and the Yorkshire Dales we have the best of both worlds


CLICK HERE TO REMOVE THESE ADVERTS