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Toonman
02-08-2014, 21:51
A ventriloquist visiting Wales walks into a small village and sees a local sitting on his porch patting his dog.

He figures he'll have a little fun, so he says to the Welsh Bloke 'Good Day, mind if I talk to your dog?'

Welsh Bloke: 'The dog doesn't talk, are you stupid?'
Ventriloquist: 'Hello dog, how's it going mate?'
Dog: 'Doin' all right.'
Welsh Bloke: (look of extreme shock)
Ventriloquist: 'Is this guy your owner?' (pointing at the villager)
Dog: 'Yep'
Ventriloquist: 'How does he treat you?'
Dog: 'Real good. He walks me twice a day, feeds me great food and takes me to the lake once a week to play.'

Welsh Bloke: (look of utter disbelief)

Ventriloquist: 'Mind if I talk to your horse?'
Welsh Bloke: 'Uh, the horse doesn't talk either...I think.'
Ventriloquist: 'Hey horse, how's it going?'
Horse: 'Cool'
Welsh Bloke: (absolutely dumbfounded)
Ventriloquist: 'Is this guy your owner?' (pointing at the villager)
Horse: 'Yep'
Ventriloquist: 'How does he treat you?'
Horse: 'Pretty good, thanks for asking. He rides me regularly, brushes me down often and keeps me in the barn to protect me from the elements.'
Welsh Bloke: (total look of amazement)

Ventriloquist: 'Mind if I talk to your sheep?'

Welsh Bloke: (in a panic) 'The sheep's a liar!'.

phillybarbour
03-08-2014, 06:58
He he.

MORGANTHEMOON
03-08-2014, 11:36
A boastful englishman said " take away your friendliness,
your mountains, glens & lochs what have you got?"
"england" replied the Scot.

Boom boom.


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