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Thread: Benefits

  1. #1

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    Benefits



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    A young man with his pants hanging half off his rear, two gold front teeth, and a half inch thick gold chain around his neck, walked into the local welfare office to pick up his check.
    He marched up to the counter and said, "Hi. You know, I just HATE drawing welfare. I'd really rather have a job. I don't like taking advantage of the system, getting something for nothing."
    The social worker behind the counter said "Your timing is excellent. We just got a job opening from a very wealthy old man who wants a chauffeur and bodyguard for his beautiful daughter. You'll have to drive around in his 2018 Mercedes-Benz GT, and he will supply all of your clothes."
    "Because of the long hours, meals will be provided. You'll also be expected to escort the daughter on her overseas holiday trips. This is rather awkward to say, but you will also have, as part of your job, the assignment to satisfy her sexual urges as the daughter is in her mid-20's and has a rather strong sex drive."
    The guy, just plain wide-eyed, said, "You're bull-shittin' me!"
    The social worker said, "Yeah, well . . . You started it . . .

  2. #2

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    many many folks drawing benefit for housing costs are in work.... they are paid less than minimum wage or are on 0 hours contracts cannot afford to feed their children so got to food banks as well..

    the numbers of really feckless bone idle "sterotypical" jokes about claimants really perpetuates the myth about the scale of fraud by scamsters.....

    Bridgwater - a tiny town - has 35 different agencies who hand out food-bank vouchers to locals who are desperate

    Torbay Humanity feed those who have no food, provide a shower, washing machine, new clothes, tents, real accommodation where they can

    i could go on and on - all over the uk



    so forgive me if i dont find this joke in any way amusing
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  3. #3

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    Yes I can understand that, it was not so much about the benefits but the quick reply by the benefit worker, you could transpose this to other situations. I am not getting at people receiving benefits I have family members who are in the same position, and I also know of family members who are on the benefits and could quite easily work. To me all situations have a thread of humour to be found. I am sorry that I have offended you.
    You can take the girl out of Wales but you cannot take Wales out of the girl

  4. #4
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    You have a point, Delica, but I don't think Gina's joke deserves quite such a political backlash.

    But, as you already made the response...

    I also have friends and neighbours who struggle at times on very low incomes and/or are disabled in some way. I've even given people lifts to food banks here!!! The way the current system is treating genuine claimants is an absolute disgrace. I get that 100%.

    But - I also personally know a fair few scallywags who've never done a proper day's work in their lives and never intend to do so - and yes, some of them do have gold teeth and gold chains, or the modern day equivalent!

    My father worked as an auditor for the DWP. He would be disgusted with the way the benefits system has evolved today. As a committed socialist he used to complain bitterly about benefit fraud being a drop in the ocean compared to large scale tax avoidance and that Whitehall was targeting the wrong people - and this was back in the sixties! Plus ca change!!

    But I got Gina's joke, it made me smile and I'm sure I'm not alone in being able to separate this from the harsh reality of life for people struggling at the bottom of the pile in Britain today. I certainly wasn't offended by it; I hope I'm old enough & wise enough by now.

    Humour is very much down to personal taste. One person's comedy can fall on deaf ears, or be found offensive by others.

    Delica, I understand where you're coming from, but it's very difficult to alter entrenched or prejudiced views (particularly those who swallow media propaganda) and in my experience it ain't worth the effort trying

    There are far worse (and much bigger!) political jokes to worry about than the above; Donald Trump for one, Brexit for another!

    Maybe avoid reading the joke section so you don't get offended in the first place? I would hate to see even more 'gagging' of free speech than we have already!

    Just sayin'
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    Very common here as when i was in there dole office once a chap came in all dressed up like mr big,fact is he was one of the top bad boys from local estate,comander in fact and taking his few extras on top of the extorsion moneys he collects from small shops and drug sellers.
    The staff we almost doffing there caps to him,made me sick to the core.
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    The UK's benefit system!

    I lived in France for 10 years and it is amazing but over there, there are next to no social handouts, if you want to live then you bloody well work!

    When it comes to immigration, anyone travelling into France from wherever the supposedly asylum seekers are coming from, the French, the Spanish and the Ialians give them next to no financial assistance which is why so many of them keep on trying to get to the UK where our social services go out of their collective way to give them housing, food, money etc. etc.

    Throughout my working life I was fortunate enough to only ever have to go to Social Services to sign on on one occasion and in so doing, I sincerely wanted to receive some help and understanding for and about the situation I was in.................. did I receive any, no not one iota of help or support despite the fact that I had paid 10's of thousands of ££££'s in income tax over the years!
    But at the next desk was sat a young woman who was in her late teens early 20's, she had patently never worked, she had one child crawling noisily around on the floor creating havoc, she had a baby in her arms and she was also patently very pregnant. There was absolutely no privacy at these interview desks and I could clearly hear the social worker, saying words to the effect............. "oh you can't get to the shops, if you fill in this form you can claim for a taxi" "oh you poor dear, you haven't had a holiday, if you fill in this form I am sure we can arrange one for you" etc. etc.

    I wish this country of ours got one hell of a lot harder with people like this of which there are tens of thousands!
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    u what

    Quote Originally Posted by delicagirl View Post
    many many folks drawing benefit for housing costs are in work.... they are paid less than minimum wage or are on 0 hours contracts cannot afford to feed their children so got to food banks as well..

    the numbers of really feckless bone idle "sterotypical" jokes about claimants really perpetuates the myth about the scale of fraud by scamsters.....

    Bridgwater - a tiny town - has 35 different agencies who hand out food-bank vouchers to locals who are desperate

    Torbay Humanity feed those who have no food, provide a shower, washing machine, new clothes, tents, real accommodation where they can

    i could go on and on - all over the uk



    so forgive me if i dont find this joke in any way amusing
    dont make me ,well not many should be there, its time they were move on, no pride no;; syphonie ;; did they ever wor--- do i say it,get the feet out of the
    trough, no chance ?pj
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    i used to work in social housing and there were many people who like my parents thought there council housing was a wonderful thing and loved & maintained the property & gardens as if they were their own , the other side of the coin are the people who know the system and exploit it checks & balances are in place but i have seen children borrowed to make up numbers brought into the offices to prove? their claim , i once proved that a claimant in one office was in fact signed on in another part of the city under a different name photographic evidence, i got disciplined for invasion of privacy glad to get out of that , another colleague explaining to a new starter said “we all start this job as socialists and end it to the right of stills the hun”
    ps heard it before but the joke was funny

  9. #9
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    Jeez! I bet Gina never thought her wee joke would create such a storm in a teacup

    I can almost hear the knives sharpening to test out how far peeps can prod each other with the 'boxing dance' before getting their hands firmly smacked by the man in charge!

    Can't we all just accept that we live in a mad, imperfect & unequal world, let's not squabble & fall out too much about it, and most importantly of all - let's get back to wild camping and enjoy the fact that we're all still alive & kicking?




    PS. It's a glorious day, the sun is beating down and the weather is wild and windy - get out there and see, it will cheer you up no end & blow the winter cobwebs away
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    Thanks GinaRon thanked for this post

  10. #10

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    Other than the genuinely disabled they are Bunch of scroungers. I have never claimed benefits other than child benefit. always paid my tax & NI contributions that go to support these feckless layabouts. They all think they are entitled yet have never paid a penny into the system that supports them.......................................

    Just wandering around and loving it.

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