My sincere condolences.
In late 2016, I lost my wife of 40 years after 3 weeks in hospital, for most of which she was expected to recover. A few months earlier, unaware of her illness, we had booked ferries for spring 2017 for what was to be our longest trip to date: 2 months touring France. I decided that I should go ahead with the trip anyway, pretty much following our outline plan, visited a few family and friends, some places with happy memories and many new places. I found it slightly challenging, particularly when close-quarters manoeuvring, but also comforting in some ways and would have regretted not going ahead with it - but different people respond differently. Remember the good times, but try also to create some new memories.