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Thread: Pretentious marketing-speak

  1. #1

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    Pretentious marketing-speak



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    i stayed in a couple of different hotels this week.

    One bedroom contained a single "Shoe Mitten" .......... poor solitary thing - i guess it will be waiting for a long time for a one-legged customer who could get up to the third floor with no lift......

    Another bathroom contained a "skin-care-bar" - described as savon corps hydratant - blinking hell... what a load of old tosh for a bar of soap....


    what marketing gems have you come across lately ?
    Likes Alf, izwozral, trevskoda liked this post

  2. #2

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    At least they weren't artisan made, pulled and drizzled with jus!
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  3. #3

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    I like chicken gravy , and it’s only a £1 , for gravy boat full. But chicken jus is about £5 for a few drops.
    The less you want the more you live .
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  4. #4

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    Quote Originally Posted by delicagirl View Post
    i stayed in a couple of different hotels this week.

    One bedroom contained a single "Shoe Mitten" .......... poor solitary thing - i guess it will be waiting for a long time for a one-legged customer who could get up to the third floor with no lift......

    Another bathroom contained a "skin-care-bar" - described as savon corps hydratant - blinking hell... what a load of old tosh for a bar of soap....


    what marketing gems have you come across lately ?
    What's a shoe mitten Collette? I obviously haven't stayed in hotels often enough Probably could have made use of a single though... I've been wearing just left shoes and boots for weeks now, with a moon boot on the other foot looking after my broken ankle.

    My 'love to hate' marketing thing is perfume ads.... what pretentious drivel they are these days! You can pick them out a mile off, as soon as the tanned bodies, strings of pearls, waves, clouds or swirling lengths of silk appear. Add a voiceover, melodramatically and moodily cooing random phrases about self-awareness, love or life itself in film noir style and you can be sure they're selling perfume. Wouldn't it be fun if they just said it smells great - buy some

  5. #5

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    Skin care products that revitalize the spiffiddodumis ofthe contralidaize fennibellicums. As if we all know the scientific names of every gene, sube gene, dna and gawds knows what of the human body. Absolutely meaningless babble.
    At what age do you think it’s appropriate to tell 
a road it’s adopted?

  6. #6

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    Quote Originally Posted by izwozral View Post
    Skin care products that revitalize the spiffiddodumis ofthe contralidaize fennibellicums. As if we all know the scientific names of every gene, sube gene, dna and gawds knows what of the human body. Absolutely meaningless babble.
    Those sorts of ads used to make my husband roar with laughter... micro peptides, biomolecular, biostimulating, aquacurrent science, cellular level cleansing. He said whatever it was, it wouldn't turn back time - just lighten your bank balance

    I've always wondered what micro peptides were, so I googled and found...

    What are Micro Peptides?
    Biochemist have known for many years that short polypeptides can have important physiological roles. Processing of larger “polypeptides” by cleaving them into shorter peptides is a well established biochemical phenomena to yield functional extracellular circulating molecules.

    I'm none the wiser...

  7. #7

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    Quote Originally Posted by Minisorella View Post
    Those sorts of ads used to make my husband roar with laughter... micro peptides, biomolecular, biostimulating, aquacurrent science, cellular level cleansing. He said whatever it was, it wouldn't turn back time - just lighten your bank balance

    I've always wondered what micro peptides were, so I googled and found...

    What are Micro Peptides?
    Biochemist have known for many years that short polypeptides can have important physiological roles. Processing of larger “polypeptides” by cleaving them into shorter peptides is a well established biochemical phenomena to yield functional extracellular circulating molecules.

    I'm none the wiser...

    Neither am I.
    Likes RoadTrek Boy, delicagirl liked this post

  8. #8

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    Quote Originally Posted by delicagirl View Post
    i stayed in a couple of different hotels this week.

    One bedroom contained a single "Shoe Mitten" .......... poor solitary thing - i guess it will be waiting for a long time for a one-legged customer who could get up to the third floor with no lift......

    Another bathroom contained a "skin-care-bar" - described as savon corps hydratant - blinking hell... what a load of old tosh for a bar of soap....


    what marketing gems have you come across lately ?

    Not new .... I was looking for a portable radio/cassette player (known as a boombox) in the 1980's and almost bought one because the blurb said it utilised 'the latest spatial technology'. When I got home I checked my Dictionary for 'spatial'. It said 'pertaining to a space'.
    Likes delicagirl liked this post

  9. #9

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    I could not believe the pre packed cauliflower stakes from a well known supermarket
    Likes delicagirl liked this post

  10. #10

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    Quote Originally Posted by delicagirl View Post
    i stayed in a couple of different hotels this week.

    One bedroom contained a single "Shoe Mitten" .......... poor solitary thing - i guess it will be waiting for a long time for a one-legged customer who could get up to the third floor with no lift......

    Another bathroom contained a "skin-care-bar" - described as savon corps hydratant - blinking hell... what a load of old tosh for a bar of soap....


    what marketing gems have you come across lately ?
    I knew you were a lady of wealth ,hotels etc,next you will be wanting a bed with a fluffy quilt.
    Only dirty people wash
    Likes delicagirl liked this post

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